weird

its funny when i learn to let go of that someone i hold on to for quite a long time (look, im not a quitter, thats why) suddenly i see theres a lot of other guys available and around me. i was just too blinded to see. i refuse to look at other people and always comparing them to him. i wouldnt say im over him completely. its just im learning to let him go. whats the point of holding too tight if u know its just not gonna happen right? so im interested in 3 other guys now. lets just say one is a bestfriend of a guy friend, another is someone i see everyday and another one is just sweet who suddenly message me after never contacting each other for nearly 4 years. I still do think of him, miss him and hang out with him. but it hurts lesser nowadays. and i think we can end up being just good friends with good memories to remember. but a secret. haha.

anyways, this past few days or a week or so, i have been thinking. am i a bad friend. suddenly i have to deal with a lot of friendships drama.

1. i said a wrong thing to a friend at a wrong time. that was my fault.

2. my bestfriend made a big decision in her life and its kind of a very very wrong decision. she's afraid to tell me about it cuz shes afraid that im gonna be angry. with that decision i have every right to be angry but doesnt my friends know at the end of the day however wrong they did, im always gonna support them emotionally. and im not gonna end a friendship just because i think what they did was wrong. its their life, their decisions, theyre the ones whos gonna be living in the consequences of their actions. im just here to tell them what i think they should do or shouldnt do, but at the end of the day, its still their decisions. garang sangat kah aku ni?!!

3. 2 of my friends had a fight, they just have to drag my name in. and now im having problem with one of them. its settled. thank god. but reminders to my other friends, when you have a fight that has nothing to do with me please og please dont drag my name in it. i was just here to listen and tell u what u should do. doesnt mean i feel the same way you did towards that person.

haih~ kind of a tiring week for me with starting the class and all. and my ptptn is on hold right now because the stupid goverment changed their mind, bloodyhell! this weekend is gonna be tiring as well, i can feel it in my bones. have to go through it anyway, right? life goes on...

*cheers*